Nobody controls his own life, Ender.
The best you can do is choose to be controlled by good people, by people who love you.

Valentine, Ender's Game ~ Orson Scott Card

Everyone thinks Hitler got to power because of his armies, because they were willing to kill, and that's partly true, because in the real world power is always build on the threat of death and dishonor. But mostly he got to power on words, on the right words at the right time.

Peter, Ender's Game ~ Orson Scott Card

Perhaps it's impossible to wear an identity without becoming what you pretend to be.

Valentine, Ender's Game ~ Orson Scott Card

I've lived too long with pain. I won't know who I am without it.

Ender, Ender's Game ~ Orson Scott Card

In the moment when I truly understand my enemy, understand him well enough to defeat him,
then in that very moment I also love him.
I think it’s impossible to really understand somebody, what they want, what they believe,
and not love them the way they love themselves.
And then, in that very moment when I love them - ...I destroy them.
I make it impossible for them to ever hurt me again.
I grind them and grind them until they don’t exist.

Ender, Ender's Game ~ Orson Scott Card